NEWSFLASH: SANTA’S BEEN ARRESTED

 
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NEWSFLASH: SANTA’S BEEN ARRESTED

 

Unbelievable but true. Santa’s been arrested.

Twas the night before Christmas,

and all through the place.

Not a creature was stirring,

except the Police.

People had started,

to call for the cops.

When they hears sled noises,

on their roof-tops.

Fyuikfy

 Santa has been charged with:

  • Nuisance for disturbing the use and enjoyment of land
  • Trespass for wrongful entry onto the land of another
  • Breaking and entering homes in the early hours of Christmas morning
  • Stealing cookies, milk and alcoholic beverages
  • Prejudicing the safe operation of aircraft by flying through airspace without permission and after consuming alcohol
  • Travelling at a dangerous speed by circling the entire world in less than one night
  • Fraudulent impersonation as there is more than one Santa at shopping centres at the same time, all claiming to be “the real Santa Claus”
  • Cloning of a human being, contrary to Commonwealth law, as there is more than one Santa at shopping centres at exactly the same time.

In separate news it has been revealed that Santa has been sued.

His workers will no longer answer to “Elves”,

“Vertically Challenged” they’re calling themselves.

And the labour conditions at the North Pole,

were alleged by the union to be taking their toll.

And to show you the extent of poor Santa’s woes,

Rudolph wants compensation for the use of his nose.

He’s gone on TV in front of the nation,

demanding millions in overdue compensation.

 It is alleged that Santa had failed to provide the minimum recognised ILO pay and conditions to his elves and reindeer.

Thankfully, Santa’s legal team at Browne Linkenbagh has been able to successfully defend him of all charges and claims, so

This year Santa’s sack is flat to the ground;

Nothing unacceptable is to be found.

Each gift is handpicked, so that he may,

make everyone happy on this Christmas Day.

 A gift that will satisfy, with no indecision,

Each group of people and every religion;

Every ethnicity, every hue,

everyone, everywhere… perhaps even you.

 So here is that gift, its price beyond worth…

“May you and your loved ones enjoy peace on this Earth”.

 

Fyukf

We wish you a joyous Christmas

and rewarding New Year!

From all at Browne Linkenbagh

You’re in good hands.

There are over 33,000 solicitors in New South Wales.

There are only 67 Accredited Specialists in Wills and Estates.

Darryl Browne is one of them.

To find out more about how we can help you, call today on (02) 4784 2177.

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